As parents, it is right for us to set guidelines and reinforce them. Kids need that. We error however, when we reinforce them in a reactionary manner – usually the result of us taking offense at their disobedience. How do we know if we are “reactionary?” Usually we hear it in our tone if not in our words. We are shaming, angering, or just plain yelling.
The Bible says to be careful not to provoke our children to wrath. I fear we do that in a number of ways, one of them is by reacting to our kids in the above manner. The best way to speak to our children when disciplining is to be matter of fact. We tell them “no” or talk about what they have done wrong in a matter of fact sort of way so that they hear it clearly, but are not shamed or made afraid. To do so, we must exercise self control – a fruit of the Spirit. Or another way of saying that is – it takes God in us and us seeking God.
I pray that YOU will experience God at work in your parenting!